Menu

Four Mindsets That Will Hold You Back From Success

What’s holding you back from creating your dream life? Running your dream business? Having your dream house?

What is it about you that means you cannot be successful? {Tweet this!}

From my childhood, I wished to work as a good maker. Then I started to build the first wooden utensils. I was looking to buy the best tools like Best woodworking books, Best wood chisels

About a year ago, I continuously asked myself these questions. I would look in the mirror and feel baffled about my situation and doomed to lead a mediocre life. And now I run my own business that is expanding at a rate of knots, instead of a work-life balance I have complete cohesion between the two. I have thrown caution to the wind and given up on saving for a mortgage and am looking forward to renting a beautiful space and enjoying my life NOW.

I’m not bragging, no, no no! I’ve got a looooong way to go! There are still things that aren’t perfect, there are still places I want to go and things I want to achieve. But then life would be pretty unsatisfactory if I was sat on a yacht, in the balmy Mediterranean weather, sipping a glass of champagne without any goals or dreams for my future. Well, sorta unsatisfactory!

So I regularly think about what it was that was holding me back a year ago and what is currently holding me back from reaching my biggest aspirations. And I thought I’d share with you today what it was that created my obstacles and how you can overcome them much quicker than I did.

Here were the excuses I used to hold myself back:

1) I’m too young.

Yes, seems ridiculous for some people but a year ago I was 21 and there were so many women and men that I looked up to that were a lot older than me. I had this image of a successful businesswoman in my head, the businesswoman that I wanted to be and that image was nowhere near my age.

I seriously thought that I wouldn’t be able to be a success, to be taken seriously or to have any of the things I wanted until I was in my 30s. That meant 9 years of hard graft and working for a pittance ahead of me. Hmmm, that didn’t sound like much fun. I once had a colleague of a similar age say to me: “I know they all spent years making tea and taking out the bins but LOOK at the handbags they own now! I’d do a few years for even one Hermes!”

But why should we?! What is it in our society that says you have to, where did this “career ladder” come from? It’s not a bloody ladder, it’s an excuse to treat interns and apprentices like shit. Fact. And if that’s not bad enough, brainwash them into thinking that it’s okay because they’ll be treated to bigger and better wages if they do as they’re told.

Well, I wasn’t having any of it. We talk all day long about equality and that is what I wanted. I wanted to be able to do whatever I wanted at whatever age I wanted to. No matter if I’m 15 or 85. And just so you know, the experience isn’t the be all and end all – making tea isn’t experiencing how to make a TV program!

So stop using I’m too young/inexperienced as an excuse. Find a way around it like I did, stick on a pair of heels and walk tall and anyone can be fooled. Fake it to make it, and make it early!

2) Someone’s already doing it better than me.

Course they are! Don’t be naïve and think that you’ll hit the jackpot with an idea that nobody else has had. In most cases, it’s true that all of the original ideas have been had, but that doesn’t necessarily mean that you can’t do it in an original way.

Yes, someone might be doing it bigger and for longer than you, but they are not you, they can’t ever be YOU. Your way of doing it will attract the clients and customers that are suited to YOU and no one else. So quit beating yourself up over what someone else is doing and get on with it. If you don’t think what your doing is worthwhile then how are you going to convince a client to book you!

Sorry for the tough love, but I learned this the long and hard way. I’m telling you now that you can do it just as good (if not better) then the rest of them.

3) I’m scared of being different.

This is a big one for me. And it isn’t really how you’d think. I’m not scared of being different in business, or in the way I dress, or in what I do. I’m scared to be different from my family.

Not so much anymore, but I still have a slight fear of growing apart from them. I fear that my personal development, the money I make and the lifestyle I lead will be so different from that of my family that I will inevitably drift away from them. And not just from my family, from my partner. I’m scared to leave him behind. Or for him to feel that we are no longer a fit.

Your family and friends might not understand all of the time but they will try their utmost to support you if they REALLY love you. And if they don’t, then maybe it’s time to move on, make space for the bigger and better things in your life. You’ll be surprised that letting go of even one person who is unhealthy for you will open plenty more doors for beautiful people to enter your life. And along with them, beautiful opportunities.

4) There is too much to do and I cannot see the end of it!

On so many occasions I have looked at the mountain of work ahead of us and thought: How is this even achievable? Honestly, it is ahead in hand moment that ALL business owners have, you’re not alone.

The only way to get past this one is to take a big deep breath. Write out – in order – EVERYTHING you need to do. Sounds a bit scary, like it might push you over the edge… It might. But you need to face up to the sheer amount of things to do. Because once you have, you can start to break it down. Take things to step by step. But most importantly it should give you the kick up the backside that you’ll need to get going!

If any of the above are holding you back, I feel ya girl! But if I can get past these blocks then you certainly can. Being successful comes in many shapes and forms and whichever you have imagined can be yours. And once you’ve achieved that then always look for the next thing, always push yourself, always feel an element of being out of your depth. If you can do that when you’re on the right path and you’ll look back at these above fears and laugh.

What mindsets have you recently shifted and how has doing so help you? Please comment to share and inspire.

Success is yours! Believe it.

Leave a Reply