I’m Going To Be My Own Darn Valentine: The Story Of Self-Devotion
It’s February, but I’ve finally realised what this year is all about for me. It’s come at a time where love becomes the focus of the media and the world, the build up to valentines day. And it’s a theme I want to share with you so you can draw it into your life.
This January I spent a lot of money. And it felt GOOD.
Not often do I spend money and not have a backlash of thoughts about it being a waste or that I’m not being responsible or investing it wisely. But £1500 later none of these thoughts were popping up.
I have been working hard on my money blocks and stories but this was because of another thought that I had playing across my mind.
It’s okay, because I am devoting myself to me.
Lots happened for me in January. One of the big life changes was breaking up with my boyfriend of five years. He was my forever man, my future husband and father of my children-to-be. Or so I thought at the age of 18…
Turns out we were young and naive when we met and love isn’t always the only reason to stay with someone. It was the most easy and beautiful break up, mutual, emotional and from a place of love. And I will share the full story with you soon.
But there was this moment in time in January when I was in total self-turmoil. WTF was I going to do with my life?!
All my hopes, dreams and life goals had included him. And now he wasn’t a factor.
So what would I do? How could I reorganise my life direction, my thoughts and my goals.
When you have been in a relationship from the age of 16 you never really have a chance to understand who you are. And when I have transformed so much in the last year I haven’t really had time to catch up, realign and accept myself fully.
So that is what 2015 is going to be about. Understanding myself. Treating my self as I want to be treated.
So that chunk of money sat in my bank account waiting to be invested, has been. It might not have gone into the stocks and shares that it was intended for but it has gone into me treating myself as I should be treated.
Act as if and all that jazz.
I am not going to go chasing after another relationship to validate that I am a good person or that I deserve love. No, I am going to drop all the pretences and love myself this year.
I am devoting myself to the balance of my mind (untangling both blocks from past lives and from childhood), body (embarking on my health in order to raise my physical energy) and spirit (delving into my spiritual practises on a more committed and intense level).
This trinity is sacred to me. And having neglected them and not balancing them I have truly neglected myself. And in the centre of this trinity lies my heart, and now I am willing to listen to it.
No more neglect. It’s time to love me…
I’m going to be my own darn Valentine.
Watch this space and I’ll keep you in the loop 🙂
How are you going to devote yourself to YOU this year?